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30 Until 30 – I’m Freaking Out a Little!

Ok so this post is totally not related to Christmas, or DIY projects, or decor, or anything you might be expecting from a normal blogger by now.

It’s about me.

Yep, just me.

I thought since you guys are all so understanding of my rants, why not just one more?

Ummm, no, this does not mean it’ll be the last ever.  Come on, now…

So here’s the thing… I’m turning 30 in 30 days. 

What?

When did that happen?

I swear I was just 25, like, yesterday?!?!

Nope.

I had a similar meltdown when I turned 20.  Like letting go of my teenage years was the worst thing happening in my life at that time.  Wow… I needed to get a grip.

I imagined my twenties would be nothing but stress trying to figure my life out, and I felt like I was running out of time to do that.  After all, you’re supposed to have a career, be married and have at least one baby by 25, right?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Dear 19-year old self: you’re delusional!

It turned out my twenties were a time of travel, self- discovery, meeting the love of my life and making some really good, lifelong friends.  It turned out to be a time to make A LOT of mistakes, to repent, to meet God again and finally start to understand what Grace really means.  It’s been pretty good, ya know?!?!

So is this the same thing? Am I freaking out over nothing?

I just keep imagining a lot more grey hairs and wrinkles on my face from here on out.

I keep thinking, ok, so 25 was unrealistic to have all of those things in place, but 30?  I mean, yes, I got married, but I didn’t do the other two things.  Am I behind?  Falling short? Or just a normal gal, making my way through life at my own gosh darn pace and I’ll have babies after 30 if I want to ok?  You’re not the boss of me!

BREATHE.

Whoa…

My family thinks I’m NUTS!

Do YOU? Or did you kind of feel a little like you couldn’t breathe and the walls were spinning every time you thought about turning the big 3-0?

Oh, and yes… that means my birthday is on December 25th. 

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23 Comments

  • Reply Danica

    Capricorns rejoice!!! I am on the 27th! Everybody and their mother forgets my birthday…ummm I THINK MY OWN mom FORGOT LAST YEAR!
    The only good thing about our birthdays on Christmas or so close to Christmas is that as you get older you become totally fine with people forgetting your birthday!!!

    Also, you are not crazy no no no no I feel the same way so often. I’m turning 34 this year and I sometimes wonder if I waited too long for so many things especially having kids!!! We are all in it together my friend! or it could just be me and you 2 crazy Capricorns who think this way!

    November 25, 2013 at 8:08 pm
    • Reply Thalita

      Oh my gosh isn’t it crazy how people seem to forget more often when your birthday is so close to a major holiday? You’re right, though… I’m totally fine with people forgetting! HAHA

      Oh and hey, if it’s just the two of us, I’m good with that – that means neither of us is alone!

      Thanks for the awesome comment!!!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:29 pm
  • Reply Brie

    My best friend has this theory: 20s are for your time of discovery and setting up the rest of your life and how you want it to look (job, relationship, home, etc.), and the decade of your 30s is when you get to actually LIVE your life and be fabulous because you worked so hard in your 20s to set it up. By the time you reach your 40s, you’re in your prime career-wise and personally because you know who you are and how to be the person you want to be. Because of this, I’m actually excited to turn 30 in less than 2 years. :) Happy early birthday!

    November 26, 2013 at 4:49 am
    • Reply Thalita

      Ok I LOVE that theory! Your BFF is a genius! :) Thanks for sharing the words of advice, and for the birthday wish!!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:32 pm
  • Reply Brittany Amell

    Hey! It’s so easy to get caught up in this idea that we should be in a certain place by a certain time, but that sort of suggests that we have control over things and who does that thinking benefit in the the long term? Certainly not you who happens to be in exactly the right place at the right time. There’s this saying that I love by Thich Nhat Hanh that goes something like “Breathe, you are online.” It reminds me that I am where I am, no more and no less. When I get real with myself and my thoughts, I find that the fears I have (which are similar to yours) are coming from a place of lacking when in reality I have so much abundance in my life to be grateful for. BTW I love your blog. I’m just in the process of applying for teacher’s colleges and grad school. I have to say that fear visits me daily on that one! LOL. Sending you lots of love, and a reminder of your own abundance. – Britt

    November 26, 2013 at 7:19 am
    • Reply Thalita

      Oh my goodness, such wise words!!!! You’re right – we have no control over anything we may “plan”, and I love what you said about being at the right place at the right time. Also loved that quote…

      Fear seems to always come from a place of lacking… and comparison, and that’s never good! We do have so much, and I have more than I could have hoped for in a lifetime.

      Thanks so much for sharing this, and for reading the blog!!!!

      Teacher’s College applications are stressful – I was just there 3 years ago! But don’t worry – you have a lot to give and it’ll come through in your words. Have no doubt!
      Sending you lots of love right back!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:51 pm
  • Reply Steph

    Oh girlfriend, I feel your pain! I too was once a silly teenage girl who thought I’d be married with at least one kid and a career I loved by the time I was 25. I didn’t even meet my fiancĂ© until I was 25! It is SO normal to be where you are. 30 is the new 20 so you have plenty of time! And it’s better to know you’re doing things for the right reason than to do them just because you think you should (babies are a big decision that can’t be taken back! lol) Hang in there and enjoy it! :)

    November 26, 2013 at 8:07 am
    • Reply Thalita

      HAHA 30 IS the new 20. It’s decided! I’m thankful were doing things at our pace, not rushing because my 19-year old self is telling me to. Doing my best to enjoy coming to terms with the big 3-0!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:53 pm
  • Reply Emily @ DavenportDIY

    30 is great!! Don’t freak out- ha, actually, reading this post makes me think I should have freaked out more when I turned 30. I’ll be 32 next year- and my 30’s have been pretty awesome. I got all my grey hair in grad school at the ripe old age of 23 though :)

    November 26, 2013 at 9:07 am
    • Reply Thalita

      I love that you were a more carefree 29-year old than I am!! Oh and the greys are here… I just either ignore them or pull them out… Not sure how much longer I can get away with the second thing, though!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:54 pm
  • Reply Krista @thehappyhousie

    Wow – a Christmas birthday!! You’ve got one more month- but who knows, you may find your thirties the best decade yet!!

    November 26, 2013 at 11:49 am
    • Reply Thalita

      I’m starting to think they’ll be great, it’s just hard to think of letting go of being in your 20’s, I guess. It’s sort of silly! Oh, and yes… Christmas baby right here!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:55 pm
  • Reply Midsommarflicka

    I am STILL 25 (for another 13 days at least) and I can tell you… I am already freaking out about turning 30. THIS. IS. NORMAL! It has to be!!
    When I turn 30 I will just have started to work (oh my god, why does becoming a teacher take soooo long?!) and probably not have married nor have a kid. So much about that. I think, if we are just “grown up”, meaning we know, where we are, what we want to become and to achieve it’s enough for turning 30. There doesn’t need to be another thing we are supposed to be or have when turning 30 :)

    Hugs!
    Love, Midsommarflicka

    November 26, 2013 at 2:48 pm
    • Reply Midsommarflicka

      Forgot to say: Love the Friends-Clip!
      Affirms me, that you know, why the Friends-Banner on my blog looks like it does ;)

      November 26, 2013 at 2:50 pm
      • Reply Thalita

        Awwww I LOVE it!!! I had never looked there before!! :)

        November 27, 2013 at 5:00 pm
    • Reply Thalita

      Girlfriend, you have five years. Don’t even stress! I was laughing when I turned 25 because 30 was still so far away! And yes, becoming a teacher seems to take forever sometimes. Been there!! Thanks for the words of wisdom! Sending a big hug back your way!!!

      November 27, 2013 at 4:58 pm
  • Reply Lauren @ The Thinking Closet

    So far, a little over 8 months into 30, I am LOVIN’ it. I felt similar to you when turning 19 to 20 – – I dreaded letting go of my teen years – – but 30 felt different. So many people told me your 30s are your best decade – – and I can see why. Hopefully we’ll grow our family in my 30s…I feel more sure of myself and comfortable in my own skin than ever before…and I still act like a 12 year old most of the time, so it’s definitely not holding me back. And I know YOU my dear have a youthful spirit, so you have nothing to fear! I’m excited to see what your 30s hold for you, Thalita! (But it’s a-okay if you’re not excited…in fact, I think it’s totally normal.) Hug!

    November 26, 2013 at 2:54 pm
    • Reply Thalita

      Well I had a student tell me today that she thought I was “like, 19!” HAHAHA I told her I loved her and that she made my day. I agree that I feel more “me” that I ever have before. I know myself and I don’t have to pretend or second guess. It’s nice! I AM excited for what’s to come in this next decade. Like you said, a growing family. That’s the #1 thing I’m excited about. I think about that, and I instantly love the thought of being in my 30’s! Hugs right back atcha!!!! Thanks for the words of encouragement!

      November 27, 2013 at 5:04 pm
  • Reply Emily @ Two Purple Couches

    I’m totally in the go-at-your-own-pace camp. I’ll turn 30 in June. I’ve gotten married; no kids yet (and probably not for at least a couple more years). I hope my 30s will be my best decade yet, and I totally agree with Lauren – I feel more sure of myself, so I’ll make the next decade whatever I want it to be!

    December 2, 2013 at 10:17 am
    • Reply Thalita

      Ok can we please have a go-at-your-own-pace SUMMER camp? Haha Then those of us struggling can learn from counselors like you! I’m getting there, though… And I’ve reached the “I’m almost excited to be 30” stage along with the “I’m actually super excited about the cool stuff that will happen in my 30’s” stage. That’s something, right?

      December 2, 2013 at 12:09 pm
  • Reply April @ Money Pit Love

    I LOVE that you’re a Christmas baby! That’s so fitting :) My advice (like so many others): Don’t rush the big stuff. And enjoy every second of every minute of every experience.

    December 3, 2013 at 8:36 pm
    • Reply Thalita

      Now I’m wondering how it’s fitting! :)

      I’m coming to terms with it, you know? I think the “enjoy the time you have” philosophy is a good one. I like being married and having no kids. I won’t like it forever, but right now it’s pretty awesome so I might as well go with it! Thanks for the wisdom. I needed it!

      December 3, 2013 at 9:23 pm

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